How to Make a MySpace Photo (Alltop Style)
When Andrew, a good friend from high school, saw one of my Alltop gear photos, he immediately knew it was a tongue-in-cheek reference to the classic MySpace portrait. You know the one. The one, er, on the ground? The one that totally doesn't look like the user at all and you can't actually really see their face anyway? "Now all you gotta do is take one from high up and wash yourself out," Andrew said.
I was up to the challenge.
How to Make a MySpace Photo
1. Apply lots of make up (I skipped this step--some things are hopeless ;-)
2. Position camera above your head, as far as your arms will reach.
3. Purse lips. Intensify look. Enlarge eyes, should you feel led.
4. Take picture.
5. Photoshop the gazelle out of it.
6. Increase saturation until your nose disappears and you can only make out a general idea of the good parts of your face.
7. Does it look like you? No? Good, you are ready to post.
Good luck out there, folks.
